Now before you read this post I need to warn you. This post deals with the scary topic of death. That doesn't sound like a very "devotional" topic. If you are intrepid and fearless and you think something might be gained then read on. But if you are squeamish or if death scares you, then you.... should especially read on ;)
Do you know what a pedal tone is? It is typically a throbbing, rumbling low note that is constant in a song. The chords and melody of the song go off in their own direction while the pedal note keeps rumbling along underneath the composition. A pedal tone has a drawing factor - like a suspended note. It is typically the tonic or dominant in the key and it demands that the music return home to it at some point. A distinguishing feature of a pedal tone is that sometimes it matches the chord being played in the other voices, and sometimes it is dissonant, but it always pulls a composition back to the "key center" - sort of the home base for a song.
Take a moment and listen to this short clip from Toccata (don't worry - it's only about 30 seconds). At about 20 seconds there is a great example of a pedal tone. If you want to see and hear it played by a virtuoso master check out this awe inspiring YouTube Video.
Why am I rambling on about pedal tones? Because they serve to illustrate a lost sensibility of modern life. We no longer feel the nearness of death.
It's amazing how God prepares the way for us. It is even more amazing how the way isnever what we expect. I often think that if I could lay aside my expectations about life it would be so much easier. I'm sure that once Mary and Joseph were convinced that Mary's child was the Son of God conceived by the Holy Spirit they must have had expectations about what the pregnancy and birth would be like. Perhaps they thought that God would honor the little one and that his way would be smooth and care free. Perhaps they thought there would be a slow recognition in the village that something extraordinary was happening. I'm sure they did not consider the idea that they would be forced to travel away from home to a strange city and struggle for survival... or that they would end up spending years in Egypt. Yet that is exactly the path that God chose.
I caught up with an old friend recently. When last I talked to William he was an aimless young man just out of High School. He did not know what God wanted him to do. He didn't have a grasp of his own abilities. He was drifting through life without a plan. But like all of us in grace, God had his own plan for William - and it started with the Christmas miracle.... of a blind date.
Now before you get anxious about this post let me set your mind at ease. I don't want to talk politics. I only know what I heard in church on Sunday. I don't have an opinion about whatever went on over the past few months and as far as I'm concerned the dispute was over the amount of onions to put in the guacamole. I just want to add a voice of personal introspection to the conversation about how toget past events that hurt us and affect us as a body.
Like you, I watched the events of this weekend with interest. It was certainly good to see Pastor Les again. I have been praying for him every day. Of course, like many (maybe most) of the folks in the congregation I was surprised and a bit awed at the quasi-Shakespearian drama being played out in the Sunday service. My own (perhaps shallow) policy is to remain a bit ignorant of church politics. It's a good way to stay healthy and happy in the church. I just keep doing the things that God has given me to do. I love and I pray for my pastors and the folks tasked with leading us. If I disagree with something I just remember that I am sometimes an idiot and I am prone to error. I have found prayer and faithfulness are a great remedy for feelings of discontent in the pew.
Anyway, after this Sunday I began musing about the many churches to which I've been attached. Of course I've been at Trinity for more than a dozen years - but before that there was a string of 3 churches as a pastor and 8 or 9 churches as a pastor's kid. I traveled and sang in over 200 churches in my years in college. I've been a part of the evangelical church world all my life. Over those years I've witnessed dozens of conflicts and over various issues. Some of these conflicts became so intractable that they resulted in a splinter or even a split. When conflict happens it is hard to not feel hurt and wounded regardless of where you stand. Something seems lost and irretrievable when conflict occurs in the Body of Christ. In the last 10 years I have learned a great deal about getting past such wounds and not only allowing them to heal, but allowing them to become a source of strength. I'd like to share some of that with you.
"Many are the plans of a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails (Proverbs 19:21 NIV)."I've had that verse up on my whiteboard in my office for a week. I often read proverbs throughout the day at work. It's sort of a business handbook for success. It's amazing how often you have to deal with the topics of diligence, righteousness, greed and deception when you are running a business. Proverbs helps me to continually remind myself of the rewards of doing the right thing. In any case, when I stumbled onto this verse last week I was feeling overwhelmed. I was struck by how this verse comforted me. The truth is, that it takes an adjustment in our point of view to be comforted by God's sovereignty over our plans.
I was thinking about the issue of trust the other day. How do we examine our trust of God? It's one of those abstract things we think we understand. We seem to think of trust as a rather flat emotion or decision with no layers or nuances. If you trust the bank you put your money there. If not, you take it out. Our trust in a bank is based on its credibility as an institution. There aren't many layers to such trust. We don't put our wallet on the bank's front step and then watch closely ready to swoop in and grab it away if our heart fails us and we get nervous. It's black and white trust. The bank has met its threshold of proof that it is worthy of trusting - therefore, we trust. But this simple illustration can't really plumb the depths of what it means to trust God. Personally, I think my understanding of trust has been deepened by my relationships with my children.